jang: (Default)
BBC "news": Greatest maths problem 'solved' on dBdB's latest crack at the problem scores twice as highly on the "BBC news is shit"ometer than usual.

First:

[[
The hypothesis concerns prime numbers and has stumped the world's mathematicians for more than 150 years.
]]

[[
It has defeated mathematicians since 1859 when Bernhard Riemann published a conjecture about how prime numbers were distributed amongst other numbers.
]]

Doesn't take a mathematician to work that one out. Then there's the "related story" link in the sidebar with the short title, "Largest Prime Number Discovered".

They really are very, very poor.
jang: (Default)
Well, as stag events go this one was remarkably free from cocks. People took their hits, tempers didn't fray, and we had a whale of a time. Most people even managed to get their head around the "surrender" rule (you demand a surrender rather than shooting someone at point-blank range, Simon).

Spike made "man of the match" through good sniping, wiping out four opposing players when he was the last left on his team, and the "capture the flag" saunter which the refs interpreted as absolute cool rather than "must... put... one... leg in front... of... the other...".

Oh, and I couldn't bring myself to shoot the Stag in the back (although the opportunity presented itself).

Best bruise of the event (post a photo, Ben!) goes to the MBA starting a new job on Monday who has a purple-and-yellow concentric ring formation an inch across in the middle of his forehead.
jang: (Default)
zen in a nutshell
there is no reality
the world is just NUL

header incoming
like a needle pulling thread
we do it just SOH

confuscious enscribed
at the start of all his works
a neat "STX"

and when he had done
his brightest students would close
with an "ETX"

the end of all things
universal EOT
there will be no more

understanding sought:
wouldn't you like to know, eh?
make your ENQuiry

ACK: a straight answer
the dog has buddha nature
like you always thought

the monks come to prayer
ascend the holy mountain
to the chime of BEL

political talk?
what is said can be unsaid
with good old BS

moving right along
a handy delimiter
Horizontal Tab

the queue is for bread
many hungry mouths are there
this calls for Line Feed

turn ninety degrees
(that's pi-by-two radians)
Tab Vertically

when all's said and done
we turn over a new leaf
emit a Form Feed

riding in grand style
Sun Tzu leads his army home
the Carriage Returns

(this one's seldom used)
"Shift Out" calls the overseer
the workers go home

a new lot arrive
to begin their daily toil
the cry is "Shift In"

Data Link Escape:
fly from Tibet to safety
DLE lama

undam the river
waters cannot be held back:
there must be XON

Device Control 2
we bend nature to our will
with this character

and turn back the tide
the ocean will not honour
our XOFF request

Device Control 4
haven't I heard this before?
ascii control freaks!

a shake of the head
I do not concur with you
NAK, I say!

the two act as one
the lovers move together
but is it a SYN?

the scribe takes a rest
and eases his aching wrist:
End of this Text Block

order rescinded
CANcel your actions at once
return to your post

the seer breathes his last
no more entrails shall he read
End of Medium

call for a new seer!
they send out at once for a
SUBstitute wise man

eat of the lotus
shake off these eartly shackles
ESCape the mundane

File Separator
the red cord stretched between the poles
keeps the queue in check

loyalists stand here,
revolutionaries there:
Group Separator

bing is not elvis
analogy escapes me:
Record Separator

one here and one there-
a Unit Separator
the joke's getting tired

stare into blank SPace
you've done too much opium
wisdom has left you

unweaving the threads
a life's works are all undone
naught left but to DEL

Dell

Jul. 7th, 2003 10:15 am
jang: (Default)
Well, as you may know, it's rare for me to be so angry that I physically shake. I hate feeling like this.

Dell really fucking suck.
jang: (Default)
... since I'd assumed that I wouldnt be actually lied to by their customer care department.

Oh well, I am still the proud possessor of a boxed Dell, waiting for collection - but bugger only knows when.

Nice machines, a shame about the after-sales service. Unless you take "service" to mean "fucking".
jang: (Default)
If you claim you're living alone, we can check your bills.
If you claim you're unemployed, our new powers let us find out about it if you're working.

Neither of these apply to me. So as an honest taxpayer, do I feel happy about these powers, about these threats?

Do I buggery.

These can be summed up as, "Big brother is watching you." This threatening attitude makes me concerned that maybe I, too, shall fall foul of the law - possibly through clerical error (there are two people who don't live in our house who we still receive mail for. What happens if they're committing benefit fraud?)

These advertisements seem fundamentally wrong. Now, instead of fearing being a victim of crime, they make me fear being a victim of the very legislature that is supposed to protect me.

If you've sat down in the cinema recently you may have experienced the same sensation. FACT adverts offer huge rewards if you shop your fellow film-goers for that bastion of international terrorism, piracy. We've seen cases recently where large corporate entities persue individuals for huge damages for the heinous sin of (promoting international terrorism and) offering MP3s to their college-mates. The law shouldn't be about setting examples; each case should be tried on its merits, with appropriate levels of punitive damages if justice is so served. This simply feels like another abuse of the legal system by overly powerful and unaccountable behemoths.

Glad to be alive.
jang: (Default)
here are the facts, there are 200 women working as prostitutes in Bristol. And almost all of them, 99.9%, have a drugs dependency.

And in shock news, of the 'journalists' working for Bristol Points West, over 99.9999% of them are innumerate fuckwits.
jang: (Default)
Tuesday 8th October

St George's - John Cooper Clarke & Lemn Sissay - 8pm
Two of the UK's finest and funniest poets performing on the same bill.
Supported by Kizzie Morrell and band.

I've no idea where "St. George's" actually _is_, I'd appreciate a pointer, but I'm probably going to go to this. JCC is pretty damn good.
jang: (Default)
I tried to depart from the ultimate expression of the poetic ideal (that is, obviously, rhyming couplets) and do something a little different. I just like the way the words sound. Possibly subtitled, "come back, Bill, everything's forgiven", here's anyone for an altoid?

(It would be great to hear Ronnie Barker reading it.)
jang: (Default)
... building plugins to out auth bridge code for jetspeed with Francisco.

Which should actually prove to be more fun than it sounds.
jang: (Default)
Nick Gibbons, who looks
more like me in photographs than I do. Incidentally, although we finally met, we didn't shake hands in case the universe ended (I've seen that Doctor Who episode).

Here's another.
jang: (Default)
question: so why aren't there lots of baby blind mad gods?

answer: bad pun )
jang: (Default)
zen and the art of not having a very good national side )
jang: (Default)
I'm now my own friend. Which is good, 'cause I couldn't stand the racket I was making arguing all the time.
jang: (Default)
since it's got as far as here, here's my list:
http://ioctl.org/jan/booklist
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